I ventured into this world of blogging with no intentions of actually having anyone "find me"... and I'm thrilled that everyone has! :) That being said.... prior to making new blog friends, I reached out to one particular blogger local in my area, whom I adore. Strictly by blog, of course - since we've never met. She and I seem very similar in many ways, and I love reading her writing because she seems like she could be any one of my girlfriends... My girlfriends and I are lots of fun - and once a month we get together and have dinner parties - usually with a theme. And we go all out - it's a blast! We've done "80s Prom", where we all got dressed up like it was prom night, complete with a DJ; we've done clothes swaps, fondue parties, adult toy parties, spa parties, Marshvegas Gambling Nights - you get the picture. So, as we'd been chatting about this - I offered up an invitation to a recent one at my home. I told all the girls about this friend coming, and we were all looking forward to meeting them. But - this person never came. Now - I totally understand that it can be intimidating meeting new people, and we all have excitement and things going on in life - but I was a little surprised. No phone call to cancel....nothing until the next morning.
So, should feelings be hurt if one reads that they've met other blog friends in the area?
My kneejerk reaction was "huh. Wow. Guess I'm not cool enough".
Then I realized: That is just so silly. It is ridiculous to take it personally - and while I'm always happy to have new friends with common interests, it doesn't mean that everyone else wants to make new friends. And I don't always have to be the one that they make friends with. Silly girl..... ;) And my general attitude about people in that type of scenario is "hmmm. Well, whatever... Moving on!"
But I have to say - this time, the kneejerk reaction still hangs out there..... just a little.
Here's Kim & I - the Birthday Girls - from our Mexicana Birthday Celebration a few weeks ago!
13 comments:
All I can say, is I would be there in a heartbeat. You sound like some of my very bestest most favoritist friends of all time, most of whom have moved out of my area. Which is unfortunately on the opposite coast of yours. Especially given my love of Faneuil Hall and Steve's Ice Cream.
Your blog friend may have had reasons you don't know about. We don't always reveal everything out here in blogland. And sometimes we reveal too much and the arms-length of a blog seems safer. I wouldn't let it get to you.
I'm with Cheryl, Rebecca. I wouldn't have missed it either, but who knows what the deal really was. Maybe she just got nervous and self consscious, as opposed to dissing you coldheartedly.
I understand your point, though. I get my feelings hurt pretty easily sometimes over stuff like this.
Hugs! :)
Thanks girls... :) And - I agree with you, you're absolutely right, and I know it shouldn't be taken personally at all. I think I was just taken by surprise, you know what I mean? And then of course - I blogged away. :)
And you're totally right that blogging is sort of a double edged sword: we either reveal more out of safety of distance, or don't reveal fully - for whatever reasons. And I don't think she meant to be mean about it, and I definitely understand the concept of being self concious of walking into a room full of strangers.
I sort of felt silly even posting it, but it was what I felt at that moment. Reminded me of being in junior high, you know? :)
Silly girl that I am!
Thanks :)
blogging is very odd...I hate to admit thaqt I know about people who live not only states away from but countries away....and I hardly know my next door neighbor's names. (they are kinda jerky though so it's no big deal)
taking things personally is what caring people do...being sensitive isn't bad, is it?
Hey Jerry! Glad to see you're feeling better! :) Missed ya!
Ms. Manners says that not cancelling was bad manners indeed.
I'm stealing your party ideas by the way! That sounds like too much fun!
Mrs. Big White Hat
Hey Mrs. Big White Hat! Welcome.... :)
Steal away.. they're tons of fun. We're always trying to outdo each other and surprise one another. This last one I did at my house was "Bloody Mary's and Mimosa's at Midnite". A twilight brunch, if you will... :)
I would try not to take it personally. You never know what is happening on the other side of the fence and not showing up probably had very little to do with you (since you did nothing wrong) and everything to do with how this person was feeling or what she was doing.
Keep on smiling...and keep on blogging!
When we reach out for a connection, we open that window, and invitations are extended. If we were to have a party, there are perhaps many people who do not make it. Sometimes our internet friends stay are best imaginary friends even though they are real.
Glad to see that you’ve met Echo. Yes you were snubbed. But, by not mentioning names, you handled this with grace and class. I tip my hat to you.
Hi Rebecca! I was glad to read your little post after my recent little jaunt to the We Media conference in NYC. It kind of brought things back to earth...
if there's one thing that's really come to the fore in my recent conference going and blogsurfing is that there are alot of anonymous bloggers and, more often than not, anonymous bloggers aren't really in it to socialize off the blogosphere. blogging represents a way to interact and have conversation, sometimes about things that people cannot converse about publicly. if they can't converse about these things in a transparent way, then they *may* have a problem meeting face to face with someone. Sometimes, too, the opposite happens--the person is quite open, but can only be open with the barrier of the Internet as a protection. Any face to face would be too intimate and frightening.
I can understand your feelings (most definitely! I've had them) and I'll give you the advice I give myself--don't take it personally. We never really know what goes thru a person's head. People sometimes just do things.
I know, though, that if I were closer, I'd be glad to meet y'all out one night :-)
Thanks for all the insight everyone.... :) I definitely am not taking it personally, and there's validity in what everyone has mentioned. :)
Hey Tish - Missed you! Glad to see you're back!
And now ladies and gentlemen -- moving onto a new post. :) Have a great day!
That sounds like so much fun!
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