Lyrically speaking....

Christmas is here
Everywhere, oh
Christmas is here
If you care, oh

If there is love in your heart and your mind
You will feel like Christmas all the time

I feel you Christmas
I know I've found you
You never fade away
The joy of Christmas
Stays here inside us
Fills each and every heart with love

Where are you Christmas
Fill your heart with love...

If you just believe.....

Tonight I watched my all time favorite Christmas movie - and I had not seen it since I was about 21 years old: "Miracle on 34th St.".

I had the kids watch it with me which truthfully, I was relatively torn about. My son is 9.5 and definitely still believes in Santa. Without a doubt. Plus, he's always asked if I believe and of course, I absolutely do. Santa is just a manifestation of the kindness and generosity of the human spirit. And I do believe in that, whole heartedly. Fortunately, he appreciated the movie for what it was, and still believes in the man in the red suit; he mentioned before going up to bed that he was going to "ask Santa" for something tomorrow. Tomorrow night, both kids are writing their letters and we'll be dropping them off in the mail.

I am hopeful that they day won't come where the kids don't "believe" in Santa Claus; I am thinking that while they may not believe that there is just one man in a red suit who flies through the air at night - there is "Santa" within us all, and that the magic of Christmas doesn't have to be just once a year...though it may feel more magical at this time, the truth is that the kindness of spirit is something that we should share all year round...and at all times, with all people.

Truth of the matter is, when Christmas Eve comes -- and we hear the "spotting" of his sleigh in the sky, we all look up and watch. And for just a tiny second, every single one of us thinks maybe, just maybe....and that is what Christmas is about.

Hope, faith, believe and love.

Once upon a time, in your wildest dreams....

I've always believed that when you dream of a person who's passed - it's a visit from them.

I'd never had one -but I've always firmly believed that's what it means - and if ever a friend mentioned that they'd had a dream about a loved one, I'd try to reaffirm that belief with them so that they'd feel good about the experience.

I don't typically remember my dreams; and if I do, the funny thing is - they don't typically involve people I know. I mean, I know who they are - but they don't look like the people they're supposed to be. Almost as if it's just representation of who they are; but usually it's almost just so faint, it's like a watercolor painting that wasn't quite dry and someone threw water on it so the images start to melt away.

But this morning, I dreamt of my Mom. She was there... and she was sick, but she wasn't incapacitated; and she was walking along the beach with me - which is rather ironic because she never liked the beach, and I even vaguely recall saying that to her -- but yet there we were. Anyway, there are many details to the dream which I won't get into here - but the way it ended was that she sent me a birthday gift. The last thing before I woke up suddenly was hearing her voice saying "because it's your birthday honey..."

I woke up..... and I cried.
(We all know how infrequently I cry. It just felt so real, I could still smell the ocean.)

I thought maybe today was the 8th -- but it's not; tomorrow is 3 months that she passed; my birthday is next month.

And today.....I had a visit.
Maybe it's an early birthday present.

Remember me to one who lives there...she once was a true love of mine

Soft sheets warm from the dryer. The sound of rain pounding on the street and the roof when all else is quiet. Peppermint oil. The sweet song of a violin. Herbs picked fresh from the garden. The first bite of a crisp apple. Nag Champa. Sweat from a strong workout. Blue Vanilla slush. The number 33. Greek yogurt drizzled with good local honey. My children's hair. Sunshine on my shoulders. Laughter. Sweet dreams. Givenchy Pi. Nostalgic music. A cold glass of peppermint water.

An hour, a month, a year....

I've mentioned many times that I believe that when a person passes, they stay with us -- sometimes there are even signs -- and if you're open to them, you will see them.

I don't remember if I posted about it or not, but in the first 48 hours of my Mom's passing - there were signs. Definite, and in my mind - unequivocable signs. There was one other sign about two weeks ago, that might not have truly been one, but it was fun to think it might have been. But since then, there has been nothing else. Until today.....

Today is the one month anniversary of her passing. One of my sales reps also experienced the loss of her Mom, two weeks to the day prior to mine. Since I haven't seen her since the immediate of her Mom's passing -- today when she came in, naturally I asked how she was doing. She answered, and in return asked about how I was doing. So, I mentioned that today was actually one month of her passing...when all of a sudden, no sooner was I able to get another word out of my mouth, but a soap dispenser cover came flying off the wall. No word of a lie. Now mind you - this is a commercial grade dispense, attached to the wall and the cover can not come off easily. As a matter of fact, because it snaps so tightly to the base - when I refilled it two weeks ago, I wrestled with getting it off. We've had lots of construction going on outside my building from time to time in the last 7 months we've been open: jackhammering of the sidewalk for renovation (so loud it triggered my security system!), the street's been regrooved and repaved, and nothing has ever caused anything to shake or let alone fly off the wall. (Might I add that I have a 42" television mounted to the wall directly above said soap dispenser....one would think that might move a bit if there's some serious shaking, wouldn't one?) But today, in the quiet store, with no type of noise or construction going on -- as we were discussing my Mom......the soap dispenser cover decides to just fly onto the floor.

Interesting, eh?

My friend K and I looked at each other in surprise....and then just chalked it up to my Mom saying hello. Remember the movie "Ghost", when Patrick Swayze realizes how hard he has to work in order to move something - but figures out how to do it? I swear, that's what my Mom is doing.

And if it's just random coincidences, well..... I just don't know that I'd buy that theory.

It's only been 30 days....and yet in some ways, it feels like an eternity.

At the same time, it feels like it was just yesterday.

Yoga is bodily gospel. ~Reaven Fields

Today is the 108 Sun Salutation Fundraiser for the Jimmy Fund.
It's an amazing practice -- three hours long -- with the presence and focus being on the cause.

Sun Salutations or Surya Namaskara is a dynamic asana sequence of 12 postures performed as one continuous flow. Sri K. Pattabhi Jois calls 108 sun salutations a yoga mala, after the garland of prayer beads. There are 108 beads on every strand. Each completed sequence becomes a bead of the mala; therefore, every mala calls for 108 sun salutations. Regardless of the meaning of 108 it is important to remember that a yoga mala is a form of meditation and like the prayer beads, each sequence should be practiced with sincerity, devotion and full attention.

(If you practice, then you'll appreciate that we do one full Surya Namaskara A and B to be one complete Sun Salutation.)


Why 108? Well....

• A Harshad number is 108
(harshad in sanskrit means
great joy)
• 108 energy lines join to
form the heart chakra
• With 54 letters in the
sanskrit alphabet each
has masculine and
feminine equals 108
• 1 stands for higher truth
0 for emptiness
8 for infinity

Whatever you're doing today, enjoy; but take a moment to step back and thinmk about those who might be struggling or suffering today - and send some positive energy and good thoughts their way.

Namaste....

Signs, signs, everywhere are signs...

I've always expressed that I believe in magic and miracles.
I also choose to believe that when we lose people we love -- they aren't entirely gone. Their physical being is gone, but their energy never dies; it just manifests into something that we may not be able to recognize easily, but yet it's there just the same.

Today, I choose to believe there was a sign of someone. It was subtle, but yet so odd to have had occur, it's rather difficult to ignore.

My mother's older sister Saralee passed away when I was 15. She was 39 years old, and had a medical condition that was impossible to have detected in advance; it took her with literally no warning. It was sudden, tragic - and life altering for us all. She was an incredibly strong person, who was always helping people and loved adventures -- and was always taking me on the weekends to go camping with my cousins, or to the zoo....or just to come spend the weekend at her house. I named my Princess Petunia for her, actually. I didn't use her name specifically, but something in the general vicinity of it.

Today, my cousin - her daughter - came and visited me at the store. It was a crazy, busy day and I had appointment after appointment with reps, which I hadn't completely expected. One of the reps brought a wine maker with her to sample me on a new portfolio release. I asked my cousin if she wanted to sample as well, and of couse she did, who wouldn't - right? So as the rep lines the bottle up, my cousin looks at me and says "oh my god - did you see the name on the label?".

Would you believe, it was Arrowood Winery's "Saralee Vineyards".
What are the chances....?
Saralee isn't the most common of names; neither is the spelling of it being all one word.

Chalk it up to coincidence......? Sure. I could.

But I'm more inclined to think that it's a sign. My cousin didn't have to be there when I was being tasted on the line; five minutes earlier....five minutes later -- she may not have been there. I could've seen that label alone and thought "oh, isn't that nice..." and had memories of my aunt flash through my mind and moved on. But to have my cousin be there to taste the wine and have it be that particular vineyard, well....that's just too specific to blame on the randomness of life.

I'd like to think that was some semblence of energy ensuring that all the components were there to allow a message of saying "I'm still here" come through in a way that we would recognize and embrace.

And if I'm wrong...well.
Then I don't want to be right. Because it's better to have hope and faith, than not.
Wouldn't you agree?