Cultivate the garden within....

Today was gardening day (after soccer, of course) at this girl's house.
I took a different approach than usual, and actually planted some interesting things.

I still have some more to do -- today was phase one.

I planted my tomatoes, and peppers. Instead of traditional green bell or yellow as I typically do, I opted for sweet banana peppers. Rather than going with the typical eggplant, I planted the Snowy White variety. I traditionally never plant fruit -- but at my daughter's insistence, I sacrified the remainder of my postage stamp sized garden and planted watermelon for her. (I hope it grows because we tried canteloupe last season, to no avail.)

In my planters, I nestled both Vidalia & Bermuda onions. I had great success with the Vidalia variation last season so I couldn't wait to plant the purple onions as well.

I need to pick up some additional planters this week so I can get my herb boxes together: Rosemary, Basil, Garlic Chives and Cilantro. I also think I'm going to try something different and plant broccoli and kale. I saw some really hearty seedlings just calling my name....

Everything just tastes better when it's fresh, and it's that much more delicious when it's from your own backyard.

I've been trying to get down to the heart of the matter...

So, before I get to the core of today's post, just a few things I'd like to mention first.

1. Do I really need to point out how fabulous our Catcher has been these days? Must I remind everyone that he's had two games now with two home runs? Does everyone realize that he's now only 4 HRs behind Jason Bay? Must I go on....? No, I think not. You get the picture.


2. Surprise, surprise -- this girl has no cavities! Seems the little divets that I thought were cavities were truly made as a result of my bad habit of clenching my jaw and sometimes apparently grinding my teeth -- a habit I thought I had done away with. Apparently not. I do have a teensy pinhole in my very last molar that she wants to watch, but other than that -- my teeth are fabulous. Who knew?

3. And now.... the moment of truth. For the last 18 months or so, those of you who frequent this page, have known the angst I've been through with business acquisitions and/or trying to build a startup. I've often said to myself (and aloud) over and over again the mantra of "everything happens for a reason", and I do truly believe in that.

If, we had bought the Wine Shop of Reading I wouldn't have tried to add an additional license to my town - or acquire the one that is in litigation. If the license in my town came through, I wouldn't have looked at Andover. If the space in Andover had been retail ready I wouldn't have been looking for a less expensive build out location. If the North Andover business which didn't require any buildout hadn't pushed so hard to force a commitment in the completely wrong manner, I wouldn't have opted not to take their business and give it a run. Had my son not had strep that very same day that I declined on North Andover, I would not have been taking him to the ER that Sunday morning -- and wouldn't have been stopped at a red light to notice a very beautiful retail space available in the center of this city's downtown area. An area that never used to ever have space available. And one that had just in November had voted to overturn being a dry community.

And one that awarded one of their liquor licenses.... to us.

It has been a long journey, but everything happens for a reason - right? Timing truly can mean everything -- and sometimes, the reason as to why you don't often get something that you really want at the time -- is because what you truly want is in your future -- and you just don't know it yet.

If anyone is interested in knowing the location, shoot me an email if you're in the Boston proper and North Shore areas -- I'll gladly share.

It's Friday...I'm exhausted and ready to just relax tonight.
Have a fabulous day!

A smile is the light in the window of your face that tells people you're at home.

I have been very fortunate.

Partly in due to being very cognizant of the fact that I have nice teeth and wanting to take care of them and keep my breath minty fresh at all times; and partly due to genetics. I have successfully made it to the thirty-something’s and officially have my first cavity. Or two, actually.

About 18 months ago or so, I thought I had a cavity – but it turned out not to be one. Well, I know I have one now. It doesn’t hurt, but – it’s become something for me to obsess with lately. I play with it with my tongue, and really must get it filled.

Of course, it’s on the side of my mouth that I tend to chew my gum most.
(Take that Trident… sugarless or otherwise, I still got a cavity. Who cares what 9 out of 10 dentists prefer..?)

Today I have an appointment to get my teeth cleaned, where the hygienist will use what I’ve always referred to as the dreaded “cavity finder” – and I will proudly accept the finding of my cavity (or two...) and schedule to have it filled – as if it was a badge of honor. I mean – who doesn’t have a cavity at this stage of life?

I used to be petrified of needles. Truthfully – they’re still not my favorite thing, but now the thought of having a novacaine doesn’t bother me so much. After having Csections and knee surgery, seriously – a filling has got to be like a walk in the park. I just hope I never have to have a root canal! The stories of those scare the living daylights out of me, and that is something that ugh – this girl hopes she never has to go through.

In any event, I am looking forward to having my teeth primped, polished and shined.
Maybe...the brighter the smile – the better my luck will be at tonight’s meeting.

Here’s hoping anyway…

My baby, she wrote me a letter....

Dear Co Worker: I hate to have to bring this up, however… please do not microwave your eggs with onions and peppers every morning in the microwave in our oh- so-little and very open work space. I hate to sound like a total "you know what", but...aside from the fact that it doesn’t smell nearly as appetizing as it would at home, it is absolutely overpowering. Completely permeating not only every fabric in the work area – but lingering into my hair, or at least it seems that way. I keep smelling my wrist to bring back the lovely smell of my perfume in an effort to mask the onions, but alas – it’s not working well. Oh, and by the way -- the rotting fruit you’ve got stored in your cubicle – please throw away. The last thing we need in this place are fruit flies! (Word to the wise, I’m not the one who’s been throwing it away on you when it’s practically ready to walk on it’s own….but don’t tempt me to start doing it as well!)

Dear DSW: I love you. You are truly a girl’s best friend. Thank you so much for having the most fabulous clearance section, ever. Where else can a girl buy the most gorgeous Steve Madden and Jessica Simpson shoes (which I’ve got to be honest, I’d have never thought I’d buy anything of hers yet they screamed my name and let me tell you – they are pretty damn smoking on.) and not even spend $40? (Actually, I want to throw out a note to Steve Madden too: you make the most comfortable heels a girl could ask for. Petite girls like myself tend to love a heel, and if it’s a comfortable one at that – such a bonus. You rock.)

Dear Charities: You know I love to give to you as much as possible. I donate year round to my personal favorites of The Jimmy Fund, Autism Speaks, Children’s Hospital and local Battered Women’s Shelters. However, this year I will be donating once again to a good cause – Pitching in for Kids, as well as possibly attending a soiree next week with one of my girlfriends. (Sure, there may be a certain somebody who’s “hosting” it… but that aside -- what better place to break out the new Steve Madden’s? Just sayin’… )

In all seriousness, this is a fantastic charity that was started by two young female entrepreneurs like myself – and there’s no better way to support fellow women business owners and humanitarian oriented champions – than to support the cause.

Note to Self: Speaking of entrepreneurism….tomorrow’s the big day on the liquor license decision in the previously dry community. If it doesn’t go our way – well, then… it’s back to the drawing board. Everything happens for a reason, and sure I don’t love my day job, but maybe the thought would then need to turn to a community once again that doesn’t have such a controversy regarding licensing. Maybe it’s time to rethink a second Metro-Boston area. We’re already in Beacon Hill, maybe it’s time to think about someplace similar. Maybe I should forget the alcohol aspect entirely and just do gourmet foods and entertainment ware -- and stick with our preferred locales?

The world is my oyster, and if tomorrow doesn’t go our way – I can’t lose sight of that. Positive thinking….positive results…. Cautious optimism….Guarded excitement….and most importantly: breathe.

Can you feel it coming in the air tonight...

I should've known it was going to happen.

My son had a stomach virus last week...that unfortunately and very rapidly spread to my daughter on Friday. As we were in the movie theatre (my son to watch "Wolverine" with G, my daughter and I "Night at the Museum 2"), during the previews my daughter sat up and looked at me and said "I'm going to throw up"....and she did. All over me. And my popcorn. But hey - that's what us Mothers are for. While her being sick completely interrupted our birthday dinner plans, I drove home - bathed her - and then had to drive back to pick up the boys (complete with a bucket for her, poor thing) my son announced he didn't want to have dinner without us and if I just made him a bowl of spaghetti he'd be perfectly happy. Love him? Absolutely I do.

Fortunately, my daughter got only a touch of it and by a few hours later was fine -- and was perfect in the morning, bouncing down the stairs ready to go on her sleep over for the aforementioned wedding I was supposed to attend. Which, I did go to - and I did have a nice time at. (Note to future brides: Don't plan a wedding at the Castle on Crane's Beach and plan it to be a partially outdoor wedding reception until mid-July. M'kay...? Thanks! Can you say "freezing?!?!"). Here are a few pictures of the soiree... hamming it up for the camera of course.

(That's me on the right. The girl who was my flower girl at my wedding - to the left!)

The next morning I awoke to an ache in my stomach, that I definitely could not attribute to alcohol. Oh no, this was far worse than anything I could have drank. Wouldn't you know -- the damned stomach virus reared it's ugly head and I was a mess. I got it worse than both kids! So much so, I missed my son's birthday party...I don't think I have ever been more disappointed. (The only saving grace is that I generally have it at my house and there's anywhere from 60-80 people there with my manning the grill. Fortunately, with the second business possibility - we opted to do a party for just his school friends at a location of his choice, which was Rollerworld.)

So G had to do the party without me, because I was violently visiting the Goddess of Porcelain. And so not a happy camper about it either. I had a headache, and a fever -- the works. Sure enough, I get a phone call at 2:15 (the party started at 1) -- and G is now also in the bathroom at Rollerworld, sick as a dog. He somehow manages to drive home...I crawl downstairs to the sofa so I can be with the kids because I know he's got a loooong time of visiting the ol' porcelain fixture ahead of him.

And the kids were so great about just hanging with me and watching tv, not arguing too much until they both went into their rooms at 7 to watch a movie so I could crawl back upstairs and go to bed. Let me tell you, if I could erase Sunday from my memory bank, I would.

Yesterday we both felt great, outside of some residual stomach gurlgling (that's still lingering, truthfully) and went to Fanuiel Hall with the kids. They had a blast! And to top it off, my son got picked to be a "guest street performer" for one of the acts where he spent 20 minutes or so helping them out and was hysterical. He was so proud, afterwards people were stopping him and recognizing him from the show. Not a terrible way to end a birthday weekend that didn't quite go to plan.

I've got to tell you, I wouldn't wish this virus on anyone. It's some nasty stuff.

If you hear of anyone having it -- don't walk -- run, and hide.

Not a fun way to lose 7 lbs.

(Sure it's mostly water weight, but what the heck, I'll take it!)

A moment to give thanks.....

Memorial Day is one of the few times each year that we take a moment to thank those who defend our freedoms and liberties -- past, present and future. Whatever you do this weekend, outside of the weddings and cookouts that typically take place - take a moment to somehow honor those who have enlisted voluntarily to protect your points of view -- even those of you who disagree with our country; it's those who offer to wear the uniform that allow you to have the ability to disagree without fear of repercussion.


.

Happy, Happy Birthday baby...

Today is the 8th anniversary of my becoming a Mom.

(Believe it or not, this picture is from Christmas morning. He lost his second front tooth that day! What are the chances?!?!)

Happy birthday to my peanut butter cup.

I love you more than you could ever know.

Let's hear it for the boy....(retake)

(This is being reposted from April 10th. After last night's game particularly, I thought it was well worth sharing yet again. I'm adding to it a bit as well, but the crux of the matter hasn't changed.)

Okay, all of you out there who bashed the Captain during the offseason……
How do you like him now?

While I am a bit biased in my affections (superficially speaking of course -- I don't know him personally), I do believe that I can be objective in my assessment of #33’s performance – and I think that his at bats have been a tremendous improvement over last year’s efforts. I’m not talking merely about the end results – but his form, the swings, and his stances.

Is it too soon to tell for sure? Maybe. But is it an encouraging sign of things to come – absolutely.

Was he underpaid in this year’s negotiations, all said and done –yes, I think he was. He is all heart, soul, and most importantly – he is talent. There is more to a career than one season. There’s more to a player than one season – especially a player who’s proven valueable in a multitude of areas to a team, over a period of time.

(And I don't want to hear that the pitching last night was subpar. Don't take anything away from the win.)

So, for those of you who were so quick to say we should’ve cut him loose, not resigned him and that there was no way that he could ever come back from one lack luster season – don’t go jumping on the bandwagon now.

Because this girl isn’t making any room for you on there.

Breaking it in Taxachusetts...

The government in our state has voted to approve a sales tax for alcoholic beverages purchased in a retail store. In the opinion of the lawmakers, this is a a change that would bring in an estimated $80 million for "substance-abuse programs".

Substance abuse programs?
Because there aren’t any other things that the money could go towards?

This is not to say that I am not in support of substance abuse programs – however, given the economy and the current fiscal state we find the Commonwealth in, I think there are a variety of other ways to spread the extra income that might be earned. And I say might…have the lawmakers on the Hill not taken into regard that everyone these days are changing they way that they spend their money – and now people may opt not to purchase these products in Massachusetts, if there is any possibility that they don’t have to?

Color me crazy, but it is abundantly apparent that lawmakers took into consideration the fact that Massachusetts is not just Boston proper. Beacon Hill, Newbury Street, Back Bay, Wellesley, Newton….these areas aren’t the 'burbs. So while there is a real possibility that stores in Boston may not be impacted as tremendously (outside of the inconvenience with pricing modifications, and of course potentially paying tremendously more in taxes) – this increase in tax can and will have the potential to virtually kill smaller beverage businesses that are anywhere in the 25 mile radius to NH. Does this state not care at all about it’s small business community?

To add insult to injury – this is going to be potential affecting the job market for some; yet creating more jobs for the IRS. New tax divisions are going to be set up I’m sure, to regulate this new tax on alcoholic beverage retailers. So more job creation for the federal and government sector….potentially hundreds of jobs lost in the private sector.

Not to mention the increase in sales tax on traditionally taxed items being raised 25%. That is a tremendous jump.

I live in a community that it is located on 93, so it is just as quick and easy for me to shop in NH as it is in MA for many of my items. And truthfully, I shop in NH 9 out of 10 times --partly if for nothing more than less traffic congestion, and most especially for large ticket items to avoid paying the tax as it stands today. An increase to the sales tax is a laughable way to attempt to generate revenue for the Commonwealth. It is however, a sure fire way to potentially eliminate revenue, because there are already people like myself who shop online and out of state; how many others will potentially follow that lead?

Here’s a thought… clearly, there’s no interest in Welfare reform or remodification of other programs that might be thick in the waist with spending. How about a pay cut for these law makers who represent “we the people”.

I know I personally took a small pay cut, (twice actually) – to stay in a job I really enjoyed. Times were tight, the contracts changed and the companies didn’t pay as much as a previous one. But I loved my job – it wasn’t a tremendous cut – and it was worth it to me in the long run.

Why don’t the public servants all support a vote to either not receive a pay increase this year….or maybe even receive a slight pay decrease? I’m thinking that the monies generated from their generosity could go towards things that this state truly needs.

Like buying down the debt of the Big Dig for one.

But what do I know? I’m just a taxpayer and a small business owner.
And clearly, I’m going to be getting it from both ends.

What a girl wants....what a girl needs...!

Yesterday, I paid a visit to my good friend Ann Taylor.

I had a variety of clothes that I received as gifts at Christmas, and some of them weren’t the right sizes; but due to my knee surgery – I didn’t have the time to exchange them. And then one thing leads to another and here I am in May with a bag full of clothes I can’t wear. So I finally went yesterday and they didn’t blink an eye – since I had the receipts – they gave me a credit, which is what I want anyway – who needs the money, Mommy wants the clothes!

I didn’t have the time to try anything on, but that’s okay – it’s like saving it for a rainy day. The next time I need a “pick me up", I’ll be heading over for a little somethin’somethin’.

(As a side note -- a beautiful sweater I was given to go with leggings had a hole underneath the arm; before bringing it to the tailor, I wanted to see if they carried it in stock. They no longer do and couldn't find it online anywhere, so I said I'd just take it to the tailor. Well, the store manager wrote a note so when I get it done -- they're going to reimburse me for the fix! Can you imagine?!? I've never heard of a store doing that. And I won't take them up on it either -- but it was such a nice gesture. Just yet again another reason why Ms. Taylor is a girl's best friend!)

Today however, the pick me up came in the way of a haircut. I was beyond overdue – and truthfully, the whole Jennifer Aniston thing I have got going on was looking far less than that. I needed help. So, I tried a new salon today near the base because it was entirely impulsive – and also because they are a Bumble and Bumble salon, which sort of says something. From what I understand, they are selective about whom they allow to be their “salons”. I don’t know if there’s truth to that rumor, I haven’t validated it – but what the heck, it sold me. The cut is actually pretty good. I’m back to being very Jennifer-ish at the moment, bangs aside – which never look good until I do them myself. And, they’re relatively short so now it’s abundantly clear that I need to get my brows done.

(I’m not a high maintenance girl, I swear I’m not!)

This weekend, there’s a huge family wedding and I’m wearing this very pretty little number to it. I typically wear very formal but you know, it’s summer – I’m young(ish) and I don’t need to wear a full length gown all the time! It’s a very pretty brown, teal and purple floral dress which is perfect for this time of year; I just need to find a new pair of shoes (DSW, here I come!) and maybe wear my hair in a fun, sexy up do – which is also out of character for me, I’m such a “plain jane”. But I want to have fun with this.

Because like I often say – sometimes it’s just fun being a girl.
*winks*

There's no time to waste…There's so much to celebrate

I think people confuse positivity with delusion.

Have rose colored glasses on, doesn’t necessarily mean that a person is blissfully ignorant.
It just means that they choose to look towards the positives in every negative – and focus on moving forward in that type of a mindset; it means embracing the “cans” and “can” in a situation rather than the “can’t” or “won’t”.

As a result of my being this type of a person, I am exceptionally good at dealing with trauma or crisis. It is easy for me to be able to help others, and be positive and strong for someone else who isn’t capable of being that way.

I am able to be aware of any situation, but I quickly analyze how to make the best of it and overcome. Seriously, I have to be honest and say – I like being who I am.

So, while I am not the type of person who breaks down or falls apart – or publicly shows emotion -- that doesn’t mean that any given situation doesn’t affect me. Being capable of compartmentalizing and rationalizing things, taking the emotion out of the situation and dissecting it logically, methodically, and if the situation calls for it – medically, is a unique strength. Truth of the matter is, that I internalize; I take all the information in, and process it -- and even when I’m outwardly positive to everyone doesn’t necessarily mean that I am not literally struggling to breathe at times.

This is just how I’m built – and yet I’m always perplexed when other people think my perspective is naiveté as opposed to a showing of strength or clarity.

Maybe there’s too much emotion on the other side for someone to view possibilities positively….there’s no availability for objectiveness.

But it still bothers me that those who should know me best, don’t.

Sheer, matte, sheen, shine...

I’m absolutely, undeniably addicted to lip gloss.
This is not something new, mind you. I’ve spoken openly about my obsessions with gloss, plumpers and of course – mascara.

So much so, that when I stopped in at the beauty supply shop today – the girl working there who knows the addiction – was happy to point out to me that my newest lip plumper now comes in sheer shades. I personally, don’t care for colors; I’m a more “au naturel” kind of girl. I prefer a sheer matte or possibly a nude tint at most. So I passed on those….

But I loved the color she had on her lips, which was a sheer-ish nude. So she pointed me towards what is now, my newest obsession: “Kiss My Lips Pearl Shimmer”. Love it. Love it!

It’s got just the right amount of peppermint in it, a hint of vanilla….and it’s really inexpensive. Similar to the Burts Bees shimmer which I also have – I do believe I prefer this shade as it doesn’t have a frost to it, per se. (I’m not a “frosty” kind of girl with lip or nail shades. It works for some, not so much for me.)

By the way, if any of you girls out there are looking for a fabulous shampoo recommendation – try Onesta Strengthening Shampoo and Conditioner. I promise, you will not be disappointed. Citrusy, fresh, organic – and oh by the way – makes your hair amazing to work with. I have always been a Biolage girl; at least for the last 14 years or so. I will always hold a special place in my heart for that shampoo and I will still buy it. But I’m here to tell you, Onesta is amazing. I bought it because the samples I was given to try, brought me some of the best hair I’ve had in a long time. And I ran out of the sample – and my hair just hasn’t been the same since.

Final recommendation for the week, is this: to save your skin from the sun use the most fabulous sunless tanner ever. I’ve been using it for the past 5 years, and I will never use anything else. “Sun Ultra Dark” by Sun Laboratories. Even girls who tan at the tanning salon comment on how great it looks – I have no steaks, no orange – I just look sunkissed. Get yourself a bottle, some surgical gloves and a smile – because you will feel like you’ve spent days in the sun, without compromising your health – or aging of your skin.

And that my friends, is my fashionista tip for the week.

No more words....

So last night I watched the Larry King interview of George & Cindy Anthony.

While my heart absolutely breaks for them…they need to stay out of the media eye. It’s not good for them – it makes them appear inconsistent and not everyone is sympathetic to their cause of unconditional love. I understand it, and even I get so irritated with their lying for the cause.

Larry didn’t soft shoe this interview so much as his last one, either. George is absolutely the weak link and could provide some valuable information to the case I think. If someone spends some good time talking with him, he clearly is capable of revealing more information than Cindy is. It is absolutely eating this poor guy up – it’s all over his face. And in his words…

Larry asked them straight out if they directly interrogated Casey when she was home on bail:

G. ANTHONY: I talked to my daughter as much as I possibly could. But then again, we never got a chance to really talk to her as much because of the investigation.
C. ANTHONY: She was home. We talked to her.
G. ANTHONY: At different times, but not the way I wanted to sometimes.

And that was said, in a tone that was him suggesting that he wasn’t able to be as firm as he wanted to – we already know Leonard Padilla said everyone walked on eggshells and handled Casey with kid gloves – not even mentioning Caylee’s name while she was home. After George corrected Cindy, they both turned red – and she looked towards their attorney for assistance.

Then there were the Freudian slips by Cindy…..

KING: Do you have any idea why Caylee didn't call police all the time her daughter was missing?
C. ANTHONY: Casey?
KING: I'm sorry. There's so many Cs.
C. ANTHONY: I can't answer that. Casey was probably grieving as best as she could.

Why the need to grieve? Her daughter was missing and with the “sitter” so she said. Why would grieving ever be part of the equasion? Unless of course, she already knew what happened to Caylee. And the only way Casey would know that, would be if she was involved.

Another one, when Larry asked if they believed she wasn’t involved at all.

C. ANTHONY: We don't have proof that she didn't do it, but there's a lot of proof -- or there's a lot of evidence out there that doesn't prove that she's done it.

No proof that she didn’t – to me, speaks volumes over no evidence proving she did. There is no evidence to prove she didn’t – that’s the problem.

My personal advice to George & Cindy is to forgo the crusade to attempt to change their daughter's portrayal in the media. Let the evidence speak for themselves and have the case tried in a court of law.

They’re only making matters worse…

Workin' for the man, every night and day...

Picture this.

I go with two co workers to the centralized shredder on base, because we have boxes upon boxes of files to shred. (yes, these are the aforementioned files that seemed to have been inherited to this position that I wasn’t happy to filter through some month’s back.) So, I am not “trained” on how to use the shredder, so my job was sort of just to help them with the boxes and what not. (Might I add, I clearly was not dressed appropriately for any of this.)

One box into it – the shredder stops. Just stops working – and we come to realize that it’s jammed. So, the personnel responsible for it come and determine, oh – it’s not jammed, it’s broken. Only about 60 files might have gotten shredded actually; the remaining 150 or so that were placed in while we thought it was shredding, weren’t shredded at all. Why, you might ask? Well, it seems that this industrial shredder that you have to take a safety class to even be near the machine to use – doesn’t shred paper file folders. Just plain paper only.

You don’t say?

So, we are informed after we started separating the files from the file folders – that the machine is going to be broken for a long time. Something about the service contract, blah, blah, blah. Actually, the girl who works there tried to get the files out herself but she’s not small enough or with long enough arms. Of course the option was suggested for me to go in the shredder because of my petite stature. (Um, did I mention that I wasn’t dressed appropriately for this? Hello, skirt and boots? I’m no way in hell jumping headfirst into the shredder!) Then, they yell at us to start cleaning – “you shred, you clean”. And because all the files were jammed, and were manually removed -- there’s shredded paper everywhere. I mean everywhere…..

I grab a broom and start sweeping. And sweeping. And we’re laughing…..joking – and cleaning it. So as we get the bulk of it up, and I say – “too bad there isn’t a shop vac!”. Well, sure enough there is – a big ol’ industrial shop vac right behind me. So, we plug in in and figure no problem – we’ll have this done in no time.

Except the shop vac doesn’t have any suction.
So now we have a shredder that doesn’t shred paper folders, and a shop vac that doesn’t vaccum up paper.

Isn't it ironic? Dont'cha think?

I swept and swept, and swept. The gentleman who is part of the office that supports the shredder comes in and says “that’s not good enough”.

Really. Really now.
It was cleaner than before we got in there.

Me: “This is a shredding facility, right?
Guy: “Yes.”
Me: “So, can you show me where my paper shreds end and someone else’s begins because I think we swept up not only ours but other people’s shreds as well…”
Guy: “No, I don’t think you did. Look at this….”

And he points to the paper dust in the far right corner of the room that has probably accumulated over years…….

And then directs me to sweep the whole place down and pick up all of the sawdust, in the whole room. I have three words for him running through my head: Whiskey Tango Foxtrot.

They don’t call me Cinderella for nothing, clearly.

(If only a certain person who wears the number 33 happened to have the glass slipper and swept me away from the dusty, dustmite filled sweeping ….. that would’ve been a fabulous way for the story to end.)

And ugh... I can not wait to take a shower.

Rubber ball I keep bouncing back to you....

I am a bundle of energy today.

Tonight is the presentation for the business venture. While I’m entirely confident in what we have to offer -- as well as the business plan -- there’s still a tremendous amount of pressure I place upon myself to be perfect. I don’t allow myself to make mistakes. My goal is to eliminate all other competition; to take no prisoners.

Maybe that sounds extreme, but this is a competition and in case you haven’t noticed – I can be a fierce competitor. Even when it’s only with myself.

Outwardly, I’m always able to conceal it. I thrive under pressure and public speaking isn’t typically an issue. Internally, well – that’s a totally different story.

Never let ‘em see you sweat.
Give it your best shot.
Prepared, proven and pursuant.
If you don’t win – it won’t be for a lack of trying.

These are some of the thoughts bouncing through my head today.

Mamma Mia....

I love the days that I unexpectedly get to be Domestic Supergoddess. Today was one of them -- and as my daughter just very recently finished Pre-K for the school year, it ended up being a "girl's day" of sorts which is an extra added bonus -- and a necessity for today, truth be told.

My Princess Petunia decided to give me an early Mother's Day gift -- or so she thought. Saturday, I took the kids to get their hair cut. After we'd done our days worth of errands, we were home relaxing -- each kid in their own room, while I was in my office practicing my presentation for tomorrow night's license hearing.

Quietly, my daughter enters the room and looks at me as she poses like she's a supermodel - and says (in a very "I'm so proud of myself" kind of way) "do you notice anything different about me?" (really emphasizing the word "different".) Suddenly, the horror dawned on me: she somehow got a hold of a pair of scissors and cut her hair.

None of the scissors in the house are readily accessible....this girl went into the laundry room, climbed the washer and dryer - to reach onto the shelving and grab an arts and crafts basket. Where she proceeded to find a pair of arts and craft scissors -- you know, the kind that aren't supposed to be sharp enough to cut yourself, or say -- your hair? Right.... uh-huh. Well, word to the wise -- they are, and they do.

Here's hoping that she doesn't go to beauty school.

I did take her today to the salon to get fixed as best as we could - and while she doesn't have a bob cut to her jaw - she does have a quasi mullet and a big ol' chunk of bald going on which hopefully will grow back sooner rather than later.

I have to be honest.... I almost cried.

Everybody's working for the weekend.....

1. Can’t read my, can’t read my, no he can’t read my Poker Face…. My God, I don’t think I’ve had a song completely take me over like this song has! I can’t get it out of my head….and I really love it. Of course, it doesn’t hurt that the radio station plays it like 13 times during the work day. But it’s a must download for my IPod on Saturday, along with other newer songs that I’ve been remiss in adding. And it’s a necessity for the weekend!

2. Why is music a necessity, Rebecca? Well, because I’ve decided that I am going to run the Mothers’ Day Road Race that I participated in last year. It was my goal to be able to run that race post surgery – and even though it’s a week earlier than I had thought it would be – I’m definitely capable of doing it. I think with the music to pace me properly, I will be just fine. And – I’m going to have a running partner this time. All these races I’ve done, I run alone; but I’ve been running with a co worker of mine who lives around the corner from me – so she and I are going to run it together. I don’t expect to beat my time from last year – or even match it, quite honestly – this time, it’s just about completion. Didn’t I say the bitch is back?

3. I’m all about the weekend…and it’s sunny and beautiful out. After all the rain, this is a spectacular way to start the weekend – and one with out soccer might I add, which is a nice bonus surprise. Don’t get me wrong, I love soccer with the kids – but I really would like to go get my hanging plants for the porch and just have fun with the kiddies hanging out. Tonight we have a family birthday party to go to – so after work I’ll be making chicken wings to bring with us; then tomorrow hopefully just us having a fabulous day in what I’m hoping will be beautiful weather. Fingers crossed….

4. It’s all about being Mom. So, the kids have informed me that they want to take me to Canobie Lake for Mother’s Day. (hmm, wondering if they have confused Mother’s Day with Kid’s Day?? Kidding…) I told them whatever they want to do to celebrate is perfectly fine with me, so long as we have a great day. I’m not fussy. My only request is that I get the 7-11a.m time frame to do my running thing. The rest of the day – is theirs.

5. Big week next week….lots of things going on. Big changes possibly. Big news hopefully. Big, big, big!!! Stay tuned….

Today’s originally scheduled post has been rescheduled due to the following...

Manny being Manny.

I am really, very disappointed by the breaking news in the baseball world today.
Manny Ramirez tested positive for a banned substance – and has been suspended for 50 games.

“The source said the substance was not classified as a steroid but was clearly defined as a banned performance enhancer according to the drug agreement between baseball and its players association. Banned substances can only be taken with prior knowledge and medical clearance from baseball's drug-program administrators. Such exceptions are known as Theraputic Use Exemptions, or TUEs. The suspension is an indication Ramirez did not have a TUE for the substance.”

Okay, I get that Manny is a pain in the ass. He’s a man-child; he’s a simple sheep who will follow any shepherd that whispers into his ear. He's a diva, and drama - and in many ways significantly represents what's wrong with baseball today.

At the same time -- he's an incredible talent. And I do miss him in our lineup. That being said, there is nothing that could excuse this, in any way shape or form. I think he's got some illusion in his head that he's "different" or "special". I'm sorry, but you can’t pull an A-Rod and pretend you “didn’t know” what you were doing! There’s a huge difference from “well, I didn’t really want to be traded” to “I didn’t know it wasn’t legal and that I needed a letter to allow a medical clearance”.

Manny's response was the following via the player's union:
"Recently I saw a physician for a personal health issue. He gave me a medication, not a steroid, which he thought was OK to give me; unfortunately, the medication was banned under our drug policy. Under the policy that mistake is now my responsibility. I have been advised not to say anything more for now. I do want to say one other thing; I've taken and passed about 15 drug tests over the past five seasons."

I do not believe Canseco's accusations of Manny being on that list of 104 players previously tested positive, yet sealed. That just doesn't ring true for me. However, there is zero tolerance for that "deer in the headlights" naivete regarding this issue, on all levels. At some point you have to have accountability and culpability for your actions. Regardless of what the doctor thinks is legal - it's his responsibility as a player to inform the league of any type of medication that might even be construed as something illegal. (But hey - that's just what I would do.)

And for that – I’m glad that the suspension was handed down. He’s a big boy – he knows the rules, and to have “accidentally” skirted them is inexcusable at this point. Additionally, I think part of the reason why Manny is the way he is -- is because he has been allowed to be that way. I've banged the old "he's your toy - you wound him up, now you play with him" drum for years now. Maybe now that it's at a level that is beyond just the locker room, or salary negotiations - something will be done about it.

But, as a fan of his talent – I’m beyond disappointed.

You might feel laughter in the sun, laughter might help us when we're done....

Last night I was thinking of some really great television that I miss – and one of the funniest shows came to mind.

It only ran one season I believe – and when I tell you that there were scenes in it that I had to rewind and rewatch because I was laughing so hard, I’m not kidding.

Interestingly enough, an article about the starring actress is in People today – which is rather ironic. It seems she’s put on weight again, and personally – I think she’s a beautiful woman, no matter what size she is. Even at her largest, there’s just something about her that’s appealing, (aside from having great hair!) and quite honestly – I think it’s her personality. So to me – no matter what she looks like, I just really enjoy her; which truth be told – is how we are supposed to view people anyway.

Showtime’s “Fat Actress” with Kirstie Alley was by far – one of the funniest, well written shows. She is just fabulous at self-deprecating humor, which is not always an easy thing to pull off. And I loved, loved, loved that she was infatuated with Kid Rock and pretended he was her boyfriend. The supporting cast was outstanding, and the celebrity guest stars all were really great at either mocking themselves - or being someone else. Seriously, if you have the ability to watch any of the episodes on ITunes or something, I entirely recommend it.

Entirely off topic – but on my mind, I just wanted to throw a baseball note out there.

I really don’t care for Joba Chamberlain. I don’t like his lack of discipline, his impatience nor his temperament – at least what we’ve seen of it. My thoughts are clearly superficially based, since I don’t know him personally. At the same time – I really would like to see him get his act together because he’s a talented pitcher. And sometimes, you have to see past the pinstripes to the potential.

That being said, I don’t agree at all with him starting this year. I think the Yankees are rushing him; I don’t think he’s got the mentality for starting right now, nor the discipline – or even the skills to go long distance without injury. I think they should groom him, let him be a relief guy for a while longer. While I don’t want him to be great when he’s against us – I do admire great talent, and I believe that he’s got the capabilities and potential to go far if he’s groomed properly.

The fevers gonna catch you when the bitch gets back….

So while they were right, I wouldn’t be able to run a 5K by Mother’s Day –– I did make my first complete mile, post knee surgery.

I’m on my way back boys and girls.
The bitch is back.
(Of course, I mean that in the best possible way.)

I’ve got to get my cardio back into gear, that was the toughest part – and of course, having had pneumonia a few weeks ago probably doesn’t help any. My lungs were singing to me yesterday. But the knee….felt great. And my quad was strong. I actually took a very long and intense yoga class last night and I noticed the difference in my leg doing both in one day. I had far better range of motion and flexibility and my knee doesn’t feel at all tight or swollen today.

Best of all, I’ve got that great soreness going on which is the high that I chase.
Sure, I’m warm and sleepy – and it’s freezing in my office, and I’d rather be anywhere else but there….but I feel the burn in my hips, and the soreness in my abs – the strength in my arms once again, and it makes me feel happy and excited to set goals and push myself once again.

Break it...to me, gently.....

Yesterday, it happened.
The beginning of the end…..
And, I’m pretty lucky -- because he let me down easy.
Not everyone gets the news broken so nicely to them.
It doesn’t make it any easier to swallow though.

At the end of my son’s soccer game, as we were walking back from the field to the Snack Shack where I was going to buy him whatever he wanted because he played so hard out there…I had my arm around his shoulder. And then as we were talking and walking, instinctively I grabbed his hand and he grabbed mine. Up ahead, a friend of his was walking – and my son yells out, “Hey Chris!”. Chris stops, looks at my son – glances at me, kind of smiles – and then waves.

My son waits a moment, and says to me “Um, so... you know – maybe you don’t need to hold my hand at the Soccer field anymore…” Immediately, I turn red --and I let his hand go, and said in my cheeriest voice, “Oh, I’m sorry! I don’t mean to embarrass you, I understand”…and he said “Well, in a parking lot, or the in the mall – it’s okay, but on the soccer field, I think I might look like a baby.” So I said, “Oh, absolutely – I totally understand.”

I had “that moment” with him, where suddenly I wasn’t his world. And though while I'm still "the best mom ever", I can't be everything at all times to him. He's my baby -- yet, not my baby any longer.

You know what really struck me the most – was that he was so nice to me about it. I know for fact, that the conversations don't generally go that nicely. I have many a "Mom" friend that has told me stories about their children being a little more -- disdainful in their growing up moments. I am well aware that our own moment could have gone in an entirely different manner. But, that whole interaction is my son in a nutshell…concerned about other's feelings; so he wanted to let me know that it was okay still, but just not everywhere.

So, a few minutes later – I thanked him.

Me: “Hey T, you know what – thanks for telling me about the whole hand thing in a nice way. Some kids aren’t that nice to their Mom when they get embarrassed a little. So really, thank you.”
T: “You aren’t sad, are you?”
Me: “No! I mean, well, yes a little but it’s part of you growing up – I’m proud of you for being thoughtful and kind when you said it to me. That really means alot. “
T: “Okay, as long as you aren’t sad.”

Of course, I was very sad….
But you know, I still get the parking lots – and busy places like the Mall.
What else could a Mom ask for?

"You can put lipstick on a pig," he said as the crowd roared. "It's still a pig."

So this swine flu really has everyone in an uproar it seems.
I’m not trying to make light of it, by any stretch. However….

It seems to me if the Government was that concerned about this potential pandemic in the currently affected states, there is absolutely a way for them to be proactive about it. I’m beyond surprised that this hasn’t already been done, to be quite honest. I mean, I’m a bright girl – but I certainly can’t be the first one to have thought of this.

There is an incubation period for this influenza; why wouldn’t the Department of Health request all of the flight manifests from each airline that had incoming flights that arrived from or connected through Mexico, into each afflicted state. (Like Massachusetts, for example.) They'd start with the flight that the boys from Lowell came in on, and work their way back a few days, and forward a few days; while you may not be able to notify tourists – you can certainly notify all MA residents at least, of their need to come in for testing. Sure, some may have had tickets purchased by others – however, it’s at minimum a direct link to them in some way, as the airlines hold every passenger’s personal and billing information.

I’m thinking even if some don’t fall ill – might they be carriers? And if that’s not a possibility, it may at least help prevent them from spreading what some may think is just a cold. Not everyone will have the same degree of intensity with this flu, so how does one really know the difference from allergies that mimic a cold, from a cold that often mimics a flu. And the last I checked, no one squeals when they sneeze - so truly, what's the obvious determination? There isn't one, hence the problem being faced.

This sounds like common sense to me, and something that the government has the capability to do – rather than letting everyone freak out everytime someone coughs, or waiting for people to come in on their own.

Last night ironically, an acquaintance of mine in NYC was talking about the hysteria. Not that the flu itself is funny – but the paranoia is. She was on the train going home from work, and coughed; she said the whole car practically ran away from her. Seriously folks, it’s allergy season – get a grip.

On that note, I suppose I should change my plans for what I was going to cook tonight.

I’m thinking a turkey dinner might be a better choice than pork chops…..
(Is that a sneeze I feel coming on? But I kid...)